getting there -one step at a time

Writing. Thinking, Reflecting. Drowsy. Walking. Anger. Irritated. Reflecting. Meeting. Intending. Chewing. Swallowing…

Well this is what I have been up to. Started this crazy ‘name the thought’ process. Similar to Vipaasana. And I say similar because I do not have what it takes to do Vipaasana at this point in life. Ten days of austerity. Maybe I could manage to wrangle the ten days out of my very busy and happening life (being sarcastic here).. but the desire is not there yet…so I thought let me try this.. One of the basic techniques in Vipaasana is naming the thoughts, watching and naming them, not judging just observing…

And goodness, my mind is one very very busy place… very busy.. it gets creative with the stories, most of which are mundane.. I wonder can how I could have lived all these years with a mind like this, which constantly conjures up one thought after another, one image after another. It has been an eye opener…

So this morning I decided let me meditate. I got up at 5 a.m. willed myself out of the bed, washed my face, all the while cheering myself and giving myself a pep talk -’yes I can do this’ and sat cross legged without slouching… and I sat and told myself I have 2 hours before the day begins so take your time to get into the groove.. so I met people and did things and went places and successfully completed a challenging project and received accolades and in between all these managed few moments of quite, even breathing… and when I open my eyes it was 1 hr since I had sat cross legged.. Then I did math -if I had spent 40 minutes wandering the wonderland, at least 20 mins I was in communion with my goal..at least 20 mins I really was present… and I will rejoice in that victory today..